"I can't sleep": Tips and ideas for getting better sleep

Dr Aurelie Lucette • Jul 19, 2020
Do you toss and turn for a while at night and have difficulty falling asleep?

Do you feel that your brain just won’t shut down when you’re trying to sleep? 

Do you find yourself worrying about work, your loved ones, your health when you should be sleeping? Or mentally going through your to-do lists instead of sleeping?

Do you wake up during the night? And then look at the clock only to worry about being wide awake in the middle of the night?

Do you check your phone at night more than you care to admit?

What about your day? Do you feel tired? Irritable? Maybe you have difficulty concentrating or getting things done?

Do you refill your coffee more than you used to?  

If you’ve answered yes to some (or all!) of the above, know that you are not alone. “I can’t sleep.” I hear those words from most of the clients who come to me for therapy. At least 1/3 of the population suffer from insomnia, and many more report some issues with sleep. In the hustle and bustle of our lives, sleeping well has become more challenging. Add to this a global pandemic and your sleep is likely to be significantly disrupted! 

But there is hope! Making certain behavioral changes can be part of the solution to your insomnia. Below are some tips and ideas that can help you get back to more restful and healthy sleep. 

Sleep hygiene can help you re-set your sleep habits and improve your sleep 

  • Maintain a consistent bedtime and wake up time (weekends and vacation included!).  Stick to your scheduled wake up time even if you didn’t sleep well the previous night.

  • Come up with a relaxing bedtime routine. Having a relaxing bedtime routine helps your brain wind down. The routine can look like taking a shower, brushing your teeth, reading for 20 minutes, getting in bed and turning off the light, doing a 5-minute deep breathing exercise. Your routine should be the same every day. This is key, as the routine primes your body for good sleep. When you wake up at night, going through a shorter version of your bedtime routine can help you  fall back to sleep more easily. 


  • Limit naps to 20-30 minutes, and preferably not in the later part of the day (not after 2pm). Naps are not meant to allow you to catch up on the sleep you're not getting at night. Sleeping too much during the day can further prevent you from sleeping at night.


  • If you're not asleep within 20 minutes, get out of bed. Go to the living room or another area of your house, read or do something that's not too stimulating for your brain (no screens!) When you feel sleepy (your eyes are very heavy and you're struggling to stay awake), go back to bed and give sleep another chance. 


  • Maintain a comfortable sleep environment. Avoid screens in the bedroom as much as possible. Make sure the room is dark enough and that the temperature is comfortable. And remember that your bed should be reserved for sleep or sex. No reading, screen time, eating, etc. The goal is for your brain to associate being in bed with sleep.


  • What you do during the day also matters! Exercise is conducive to better sleep, but try to avoid exercising in the hours preceding bedtime. The following should also be limited prior to bedtime: Caffeine, alcohol, nicotine, and heavy meals. Exposure to natural light is important as it helps regulate your internal clock (go outside every day and open the curtains to let natural light in). Finally, certain medications can interfere with sleep, you may want to discuss this with your physician if you think it’s contributing to your sleep difficulties.


While stress is a common cause of sleep problems, many other factors can contribute to insomnia, including psychiatric disorders (depression and anxiety), chronic pain, certain medications and medical conditions. For instance, insomnia is very prevalent in those with a cancer diagnosis or chronic pain. Developing an understanding of the underlying causes of your insomnia can help address it appropriately. 


My sleep hygiene is top-notch and I'm still not sleeping. What should I do?

Treatments are available to help with sleep issues, including medications and behavioral treatments. Cognitive and behavioral therapy for insomnia, commonly referred to as CBT-i is a behavioral treatment that has proved safe and effective to address insomnia. CBT-I doesn’t fix sleep overnight but it is a viable alternative to sleeping pills  if you are willing to commit to it! Research seems to indicate that its benefits can be longer lasting that pharmacological treatments. If you are interested in giving it a try, make sure to ask your therapist if they have experience providing this specific treatment modality. Not every therapist does!


If you continue to struggle with significant sleep issue despite maintaining good sleep hygiene, or if insomnia interferes with your mood or daily functioning, seek help from your health care team or a mental health provider with expertise in sleep disorders.

I am Dr. Aurelie Lucette, a clinical health psychologist who provides individual therapy in Miami and online throughout the state of Florida. I can help with issues related to anxiety, stress, sleep, and depression. I also specialize in therapy for adults living with cancer , chronic illness, chronic pain.



I look forward to helping you get better sleep and feel more balanced!



Schedule a free 15-min consultation
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